Tuesday, February 1, 2011

The meaning of the phrase "Best Friend"

Lately I've been wondering. Why is it we feel the need to categorize a friend as a "best" friend. You can have a group of friends that aren't really friends at all and to say to one, "You are the best of the bunch" isn't necessarily a compliment. The term can also make others of your very good friends feel put down. Again, I ask, why is this phrase important or necessary? Does it help us feel better about ourselves when we have a "best" friend.

We are all different. We all offer each other something different in the ways of friendship. WHY is one best over the others? WHY should one BE best over the others? All of my friends are unique individuals and I don't want to single one out as best or single out the others that aren't labeled as best.

I think it's time I let go of the power this phrase has over me. The friends in my life are there for a reason. They know how much they mean to me. And I would hope they would know that without the use of phrases.

My heart is full. My heart is open. It is ever expanding. It has room to grow.

Some friends leave us and some stay with us forever. They all have parts to play in our lives. In our hearts. Don't be bitter for those who leave or walk away. Just look back and see how it helped you grow.

Really that is advice I am giving myself.

It's time to let go.
It's time to make sure I let those who matter in my life now know just how much they matter in my life.

We are not our labels.

We are love.

Spread it around.

Peace and love.


Charlotte said...

I have a hard time with 'best friend' because I want a special names for those who are closest to me. I call casual, coworker, acquaintances 'friends'; they don't mean the same as those people who are deep in my heart. I don't like the phrase 'best friend', but I don't know any better ones.

Violet Bella said...

totally understand what you are saying, and agree for the most part. but for me, when my friend shelley and i call each other 'bestie' or 'bfff' a.k.a. best fucking friend forever... ha ha, its something that is just a bond between us that i would never want to take away. ive alot of people i would call best friends throughout my life, and yes, some really are better than others, even though they all have their place in my life and heart, some are just on a deeper level of friendship, and it feels good to call them the best. and yet, it may make someone else feel bad, it shouldnt. unless you are in high school, then its a BIG deal, ha ha. i think the best friend thing with me goes more into a long term friendship, one that has grown throughout my entire life. i doubt id call anyone else that, unless ive known them for many years and have that certain commited bond. i guess what im saying, is i dont see it as a bad thing or a good thing. its just an individual thing, a choice, not good or bad. maybe it is a label, but not all labels are bad. i love all of my friends openly and equally, its just a fun thing we started forever ago, that will stick with us most likely for our entire lives. and i love that. its comforting.

Poor Pitiful Pearl said...

I agree with Laura.. I think its a personal thing.. but I do like some of your points.. about people being in our lives for a reason.. yes! and there is always room for more.

My best friend Selena has been through some really hard times in my life... and really noone knows me the way she does... but she isnt my only friend... I just trust her more than I do anyone else.

I like your little thoughts tho.. fun to read :)

Peace Love and Leener said...

This is just what works for me. This was just to put a different view out there of how it might make others feel. I don't condemn anyone who uses this phrase. That is what works for them. We of course have friends that fit us better and fit our needs more. The phrase just does more harm than good in what I've personally experienced.

Brittany said...

i agree...with pretty much every single thing you wrote. :)

Morgan@Meet Virginia said...

Thanks for all the love you left on my blog girl! I totally agree with you!!

Kamika said...

You are such a wonderful soul! Beautiful post, and beautiful words